Original Publication Date: 7/13/08
Hey Scoobie Gang!
So I’m in Chicago for another day trying to set a few things up for a potential signing, right? Well, I decide to get internet access for the hotel room so I can get a few e-mails out and also monitor if the books are on Amazon. They are and the cover art was added as of this morning. It’s alllllllll good news. Then, too, this is my life and I’ve come to expect the unexpected. Why? It just happens. There’s really no other explanation for it.
Ancient Chinese prophesy foretells of a grand matriarch, a woman so devoted to her grandchildren that any potential suitor who doesn’t meet her expectations and challenges her authority, soon disappears under mysterious and unpleasant circumstances. Her reign of terror is said to last nearly thirty years. Prophesy also foretells of a stranger from the West, a clueless-yet-well-meaning gweilo, whose affections for her grandson will tear at the very fabric of her universe. And the ensuing battle—between the white guy and his boyfriend’s evil Grandmonster—is said to be one that will one day turn prophesy into legend.
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I was watching An American President before bed one evening this past week and found myself wondering what it would actually be like if we had a president in office like the one Michael Douglass portrayed. Wouldn’t that be something to have someone who actually made decisions because they were the right thing to do, not the political thing to do? And as difficult as he was to watch, it was probably dead on accurate how Richard Dreyfuss’s character based his entire campaign on the matter of character when there really wasn’t one. It was invented, but it’s all about perception, isn’t it? The only reason I bring this up is because I recently found out someone took a shot at my father’s character and I’m not entirely comfortable with it.
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Original Publication Date: 7/09/08
‘allo everybody!
Yes, the evil from Hong Kong is amongst us. More on her in a moment.
And now a word from our sponsor:
Andy Stevenson Vs. the Lord of the Loins is ready to be delivered from the printer! There’s a tiny hitch with the cover for the reprint of A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to My Sexual Orientation, so that won’t be ready until Friday (it’ll be added to Zumaya’s site at that point and will be showing up with “Andy Stevenson” on Amazon.com). Then, of course, both get sent to the publisher who then sends copies out to bookstores and anybody who pre-ordered.
And let’s face it, aside from your own personal library, these would make terrific birthday gifts, anniversary gifts, Christmas gifts, Valentine’s Day gifts, Sweetest Day gifts…circumcision gifts. Trust me, you’re getting a lot for your money. Heck, buy an extra copy and donate it to your local LGBT organization (Note: I said “extra” copy there…as in more than 1). I swear, leaving all the brainstorming up to me is so unfair!
Now, let’s talk Grandmonster.
So I was at J.C. Penny last night after work where they were holding a pair of dress pants for me. The pair at their sister store the previous night was too short. Naturally, these were too long. But the suit jacket was my favorite, so I figured I could get the pants tailored. One thing I’ve learned when shopping for clothes is this, though: always get the opinion of the Asian in the relationship and if he’s not available, get someone else of Chinese ethnicity–since he’s half Chinese and trusts his fellow gay Chinese friends–to step in and offer his opinion. I did. A good friend of mine met me there to make sure my selection was acceptable. It was. The gentleman waiting on me knew the reason for the suit and when my friend showed up, looked at him and said “Congratulations!” While my friend’s response was a deadpan “What?”, my response was a bit more animated. “Uh, he’s not the one getting married. Right ethnicity, wrong person.” Good to know I have a back-up just in case my guy leaves me at the altar. The suit is currently being tailored and can be picked up in a week. Oy…
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I do some work for a company that pays very close attention to social media. I know, I know. Moi? Work? Pookie says if I’m not barefoot and pregnant at home, my supple ass has to get out there and earn us some money. Personally, I think I’d make a pretty awesome house husband. We’ll see. I’m working on it. Give me a few more months. Anyway, back to topic, the folks where I work and I are fairly well-versed in online etiquette…despite some of my posts and things I say that might suggest the contrary. But there are just some things you don’t do. And if you do happen to do them, there are things you don’t go and do after you’ve gone and done what you did! Are you following me? Good, because some of this gets a little complicated.
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Original Publication Date: 6/25/08
Hey everyone!
Just a quick update tonight. I’ve been wanting to blog for a week now, but between my Pookie coming home last weekend, preparing for the Grandmonster’s visit (yes, shields up, phasers charged, photon torpedoes armed, holy water in the squirt guns and crosses on the doors and walls!) and now I’ve got the galley for the reprint of the first book, I hast noeth timeth.
Did you know that my guy, my Pookie, my soon-to-be-hubby, is brilliant? See, I know this because he’s told many, many, many times. His Grandmonster even thinks he’s the Second Coming. I could make a really cheap sexual innuendo here, but you go ahead and make that connection for yourself. It’s probably accurate. Anyway, his brilliance was sitting next to me on the return trip from Hong Kong a few days ago and he selected 2001: A Space Odyssey on Delta’s video system to watch. It started and I soon caught him shaking his head out of the corner of my eye. I asked what was wrong and he said “I’ve tried to watch this movie on three different flights and it’s the same thing each time. The movie’s broke.” Huh? Sweetie, it’s the fanfare. Wait a few minutes and the MGM logo will come up. “Really?” It did. I guess I just enhance his brilliance.
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If you’ve never had the chance to go overseas, I highly recommend it. Why? Because it’s not where you currently are and it has the potential to give you a whole new appreciation for how things are done elsewhere. We need that. We need a reminder that we’re not the center of the universe. We also need a reminder that true evil exists, usually in the form of an in-law. In my case, my guy’s Grandmonster. The recent Chinese New Year gave her a number of opportunities to have the elite ninja squad she keeps on payroll snuff me out, only that didn’t quite happen. No, she had other forms of torture planned. I’m getting ahead of myself, though. Are you ready for some video clips to accompany this? Then read on!
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Original Publication Date: 6/10/08
“…Tesla Girls…Tesla Girls…I’m in love with Tesla Girls…”
Gotta love OMD and you gotta love the fact these guys got back together some 20 years after parting ways to release a live DVD of one of their classic albums, then deliver another 12 of their delicious hit songs. But seriously, what the hell is a Tesla Girl? If they’re any good, maybe they have brothers? Mmm…Tesla Boys!
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