It may shock some of you to learn this, so prepare yourself. I may, just may, have seen an adult movie…or two…or 200…in my life. I know, bizarre, right? You have no idea how difficult it is at times to convince folks I’m as pure and angelic as I need them to think I am. It’s not easy. I remember the first time I watched one back in college when all my roommates were at class–mostly because they wouldn’t have appreciated watching it with me. I was nervous, shocked, giggly, turned on, turned off, turned on again and couldn’t believe my eyes. It was called A Scent of Man, only I don’t recall anybody taking the time to really inhale and enjoy the scent of cologne anyone was wearing.
If I recall, the opening bit of dialogue entailed a taller guy walking onto a bedroom set with a shorter, younger, cuter looking guy and saying “This is my room. This is my bed. And this,” he grabbed his crotch, “is my dick.” This was my introduction to gay porn and I remember sitting there and my first thought being “I can write better dialogue than this!” The younger guy, much to my surprise, didn’t comment on the taller one’s lack of vernacular or enticing pick-up lines. He was apparently horny, responded with an interested “All right!” and grabbed the other man’s privates.
The film felt a little like an out-of-body experience for me. You have to be 18 to watch an adult movie, yet I’d been doing everything I saw on the screen for…well, longer than most folks are comfortable knowing. Anyway, most adult movie actors aren’t that impressive. Think about it. How many actors from one film can you usually name? Probably one because you need a star to sell the title. The only actor I remember from A Scent of Man was the shorter cute one. His name? Kip Tyler (his real name was Jack Hawkins). Unfortunately, he passed away from AIDS in 1995.
If not for Kip, I probably wouldn’t have bothered watching another of those films for a long time. Not that I watched a lot of them or had a chance to watch a lot of them anytime soon after that anyway. I might have, but I didn’t. Not until after I graduated from college. Maybe.
My guy and I have never been at a loss to spice up our love life. We did watch a few adult films together, only it was for entertainment purposes and we’d make fun of the dialogue, what passed for plot and the sad, bored grunts and groans of performers faking their way through a scene. We apparently never watched award winning adult movies and just wound up with…well, lesser efforts. That and we had slightly different ideas of what we found enjoyable in adult movies. He liked what he liked–you’ll have to ask him about that yourself–and I discovered an actor named Jordan Young.
My guy falls into the category of being Asian and not finding other Asians attractive. Jordan Young is half Asian, half Greek and fully delicious! While my guy would ogle his type on screen and get my goat that way, I started renting all of Jordan’s films and enjoying those. It was mostly to annoy my other half, but it was also because the guy was a real looker.
The reason I bring Jordan Young up is because when I was writing A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to My Sexual Orientation, I needed to picture someone in my mind who Andy would be attracted to and go gaga over. So, I asked myself, if I’m not with Pookie, who would I want to be pursuing me? The answer was Jordan. The character’s name in the book? Jordan. See how nicely that fit?
Had I written the book today, I might have thrown in a bit of Brent Corrigan or suggested that I would have enjoyed being mounted by Brent Everett or Brandon Lee, maybe even twice or both at the same time. That’s the writer in me…thinking about the possibility of having a porn actor in him. It’s all good. It’ll never happen, but it’s all fun and games to think about provided it inspires solid fiction and that’s exactly what it’s done.
It’s interesting to note that Jordan Young learned quite a bit about the industry when he was in it, then made the transition outside of porn. His real name is Billy Kemp–isn’t it a cliche that there’s always a gay guy named Billy?–and he’s the Vice-President of Casting and Talent for Fremantle Media. Not bad, huh? The guy did pretty damn good for himself. Brent Corrigan and Brent Everett continue to make a name for themselves in the industry and as for Brandon Lee… Well, I’ve never met the guy, so I can’t say one way or the other about the rumors. If they’re true, then I hope he gets help.
Maybe my friend and fellow author, G.A. Hauser is right. Maybe I should give erotica a try one day. Just once. I might have to do it under a different name, though. What would you think if I did that as an experiment? Would you be willing to give a story like that from me a try or would you pass it on by?
Kage Alan is The Outlaw Josey Wales watching, Brad Fiedel listening author of “A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to My Sexual Orientation,” “Andy Stevenson Vs. the Lord of the Loins” and the first book in a separate series, “Gaylias: Operation Thunderspell.” He just finished watching the special edition Blu-Ray of Pulp Fiction today. It’s been a while, but it was still a film that demands attention. So maybe he should attempt to write an erotic story that captures the attention of readers in the same way.